Bagerhat, Bangladesh - For fifteen years, Shayla*, 40, was a trusted matchmaker in her village Bagerhat. Like many in her community, she never questioned the age of the girls whose marriages she arranged. Child marriage was widely accepted as a way to secure the future of girls in economically struggling families.
One marriage, however, changed everything. Shayla encouraged the family of 13-year-old Shyamoli, to marry her off. Shyamoli's father was blind and unable to work, while her mother struggled to support the family and keep both daughters in school. Believing marriage would offer Shyamoli a better future, Shayla repeatedly persuaded Shyamoli's mother until she agreed.
Instead, the marriage exposed Shyamoli to violence and abuse. Her husband demanded dowry for a motorcycle, physically assaulted her, and later demanded more money to start a business. Despite her mother's efforts to meet the demands by taking out a loan, the abuse continued. Eventually, Shyamoli was forced to leave her husband's home and was later divorced.
Months later, Shayla attended an orientation session under the Shombhabona Project, with technical support from UNFPA, funding from the Embassy of the Kingdom of the Netherlands and implemented by ActionAid Bangladesh in collaboration with Jagrata Jubo Sangha. During the session, she learned about Bangladesh's legal minimum age of marriage, the laws protecting children, and the far-reaching consequences of child marriage, including interrupted education, health risks, domestic violence, dowry-related abuse and early divorce.
Looking back at the many marriages she had arranged over the years, Shayla realised that very few of the girls had gone on to lead happy lives. Shyamoli's experience became a painful reminder of the lasting harm child marriage can cause. Determined to make a change, Shayla promised herself that she would never again arrange the marriage of an adolescent girl.
Her commitment was tested soon afterwards. A family approached Shayla to arrange the marriage of their 15-year-old daughter. This time, she refused. She explained the harmful consequences of child marriage and spoke with the girl's family about the risks it poses to girls' health, education and future. Even when offered a substantial payment, she stood firm. At first, the family agreed to wait. But a few days later, Shayla learned that the girl had been married in secret to a 40-year-old man in another community.
The news left her deeply disappointed. She realised that while changing one person's mindset is important, ending child marriage requires the collective efforts of families, communities, local leaders and institutions.
Despite this setback, Shayla has not given up. She now speaks with parents, neighbours and fellow matchmakers about the harmful consequences of child marriage. She encourages families to keep girls in school and to support them in reaching adulthood before marriage.
"I can no longer be part of a practice that steals a girl's future. Instead, I want to help protect it," said Shayla.
*Name is changed to protect identity
